Tuesday, February 22, 2011

"She's Always a Woman to Me" by Billy Joel

I think Billy Joel gets a bad rap from critics, and I'm not sure why. I like most of his popular stuff, except for that damn fire song.

Original lyrics:
She steals like a thief
But she's always a woman to me


Lewd lyrics:
She stinks when she queefs
But she's always a woman to me


I'll admit that the only reason I came up with this one is because I love the word queef.

Monday, February 7, 2011

"Voices Carry" by 'Til Tuesday

Here's a 1980s classic.

Original lyrics:
Hush hush
Keep it down now
Voices carry

Lewd lyrics:
Flush flush
Flush it down now
Dysentery

I got tired of my wife singing this song all the time so I changed the words a little. Notice how dysentery fits so much better than diarrhea even though both have four syllables. I take my craft seriously!