Monday, October 4, 2010

"It's Only Rock and Roll" by the Rolling Stones

Nothing is sacred here at Lewd Lyrics, not even the self-declared "World's Greatest Rock and Roll Band."

Original lyrics:
I know it's only rock and roll but I like it

Lewd lyrics:
I know a cunt's a stinky hole but I like it

I always thought Mick Jagger was the womanizer of the Stones -- just ask Jerry Hall -- but then I heard Bill Wyman's claim that he has slept with 1,000 women. That surprised me; no one ever suspects a bassist of getting that much tail. On reflection, it makes sense, though. While Mick and Keef are sitting through endless interviews, the other guys in the band have to do something for entertainment. While Charlie Watts probably listened to jazz music, Bill was listening to the fevered moans of faked orgasms from desperate starfuckers*. I'm not the best judge of male beauty, being a hetero guy, but I don't think he is particularly attractive (okay, I think he's downright funny-looking). I can't help wondering if his most successful pick-up line was, "Want to meet Mick Jagger?" Maybe Bill could sing along with these lewd lyrics since he clearly has an affinity for that stinky hole.

* That's not me being lewd -- it 's a Rolling Stones song.

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